Skip to main content

Five Minute Fridays - Dare

Its a special day for our family.  The baby's birthday.  So had to believe 600 and more days have clicked away since we first beheld her face.
Today I'm joining a flashmob of writers at Heading Home for five minutes of writing about one word...
DARE

Its funny that this would be the word.  I have not felt very daring as of late.  Questions, doubts, and confusion have hung like storm clouds low to the earth.  Like June humidity bearing down and making it hard to think.
Satan always knows what he can touch in our lives that will send us reeling.  He knows those outskirt issues in our lives that still fester, have never quite healed.  He remembers them even when I forget them.
Recently i had them nettled, prodded again.
I felt them sting.
It had been a while.  But I was brought back to the realization that some thorns in our flesh are there for a reason.  I've prayed Paul's prayer before that they would be removed and quick.
And some are removed and we celebrate the victory. Sometimes though they are the vice God uses to make me walk beside Him and lean hard into Him.
 Sometimes the battle I go through is like spiritual weeding.   You kill the weeds in one patch of grass but find in another.  They have to be yanked out by the roots.
I went through some of that weeding recently.  And it hurt.  But what Satan meant for evil God transfigured for good. He taught me a lot.  Still is.  About who He is and who i am.  About grace, second chances, and the stark reality that none of us possess all the answers.  Only Jesus does.
About putting childish ways of thinking away.  Thinking like the woman I'm supposed to be.  The one who has had Christ living within her for many years now.  Sometimes those childish ways of thinking are hurts from the past, lies I believed that He must root out.

I had thought about completely deleting my blog.  Never stuttering across keys again.  Just giving up in different avenues of my life.  Why is it worth it, if I seem to make a glaring mess of whatever my hands touch?  That is the lie I believe I was offered.  Would I believe it? I had definitely been offered that lie on many occasions of my life.  And many times I had believed it.
I had believed it as a teenager, as young child, as mother, as a wife, and here it was again. Would I put away the childishness of believing that I had to get everything right or would I embrace that I who makes a plethora of mistakes am always offered grace for them.  Would I let God pull out from me the lie i had received and accepted that I had to be perfect to be a Christ follower?

The tentacles of it wrapped around my heart.  Like they have before.
But they did not win.
Today as I opened up my Bible I unexpectedly opened to some of my favorite verses... 2 Corinthians 3 & 4.
Those chapters are so powerful, so hopeful, so what I always need to remember.
Two treasures tucked into the last of chapter 4 read, "For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

What a promise.  That all the storms, all the battles, all the trials are achieving for all of us who bear the name of Christ an eternal glory that overshadows them all.  That nothing I ever go through in this life will be wasted.  It will all be worked out for the good.  That those things I war against are not wasted.  They are a part of my story, my testimony, the glory of God's work in my life.

The past two weeks in Awanas I have been helping my oldest daughter remember Psalm 23.  We all know this Psalm backwards and frontwards.  But when I chant it out with her I savor each verse.
Verse 5 soaks into me...

You prepare a table before me
 in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
 my cup overflows.

Sometimes the table I get to enjoy is precisely in the presence of my enemy.  Our only real enemy Satan.  
It's funny how so often I want to run when I see his work, feel his doubts, and hear his accusations heavy and hot in my ears.  
Many times that is where the richest table of my life is, where my cup runs overflowing.  Where the glory of Christ in my life shines the brightest. Right there in the presence of the dark.  

Do I dare? Dare to obey God, to believe God when the dark tries to silence me, condemn me, and quiet me.  
I haven't always won this battle, but I say "Yes" today.  


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

31 Days of Free Writes #Wave

Four summers ago the first weekend in September marked one month.  One month lived out shaky and unsteady.  Just putting a few steps in front of the other and letting tears drip down faces or anger spill out at the sky.  "Why?"
I had watched my husband shake violently at the graveside of his twenty-six year old brother as he sat a few inches from the casket.
My usually stoic husband reached out for the casket as he passed by and I heard his voice crack as he called out his name.  One more time. I had never seen him stricken with grief.  That groan of emotion haunted me.   Those fifteen minutes spent under the funeral home's green awning the last minutes his family would ever be within arms length of this special brother.  A brother who had just slipped quietly out of this life beneath the green gold water of a river one steaming August day.  Bare chested and tan, jumping off the dock with friends.  Never to resurface again.
A lot of that week in August was just wakin…

Five Minute Fridays - "Last"

Last is such a final word, it’s a word that always makes us sit back and take note. We take note of the fact that something is about to draw to an end and we better enjoy the last drops, savor the last bites before its all gone. Like that last hot week of summer that we spend soaking up every last beam of Vitamin D. Or that last couple bites of a once a year Christmas dinner, slowly swallowed down. Or maybe the last night of a vacation where we try to take note of everything and know that we are returning to real world, real bills, real deadlines all seemingly too soon. Two weeks ago I experienced a last. For seven months I was given a gift. It was truly an unexpected gift. One I had never anticipated being given. For the past six years my sister Faith and I have lived in different cities for most of the time. We always mused over the idea that we should've lived together for at least one year of college. But from icy January 4th to steamy August 10th I had the gift…

Morning

Five Minute Fridays
Morning

Morning seems sacred to me.  Having nocturnal children kind of robs me of the mornings I like to enjoy in silence and quiet thought.
For years I would get up at least two hours before anyone so I could just be by myself and be quiet.
My parents are early morning people that like to eat full breakfasts and watch the sunrise on the porch. There's something exciting about watching the day open its' eye lids with the first glints of sun playing on the horizon edge.  Pale blues and periwinkles rouse us out of pitch black and many times morning rises in strength with extravagant colors.  It signals something new.  A new twenty four hours.  A new chance. Kind of like a new little slice of life.  We are mesmerized at first at the idea of new.  It's beautiful, holy, and hopeful.
Morning breaks the night.
I love that Cat Steven's hymn Morning has Broken.  I've always thought the words were so beautiful.
Especially the last phrase, "God&…